Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Fun things to do in Iowa in July

1. Sweat.

2. Water things.

3. Sweat while watering.

4. Weed things.

5. Sweat while weeding.

6. Apply sunblock.

7. Sweat.

8. Reapply sunblock.

9. Sweat.

10. Reapply deodorant.

11. Burn butt on hot car seat.

12. Swear.

13. Sweat.

14. Burn bare feet on asphalt.

15. Prance around on tiptoes to get off asphalt.

16. Wave at car stopped in street, occupants staring.

17. Shut garage door.

18. Go boating.

19. Apply sunblock.

20. Sweat.

21. Swear while applying more sunblock.

22. Pick up metal watering can.

23. Burn hand.

24. Swear.

25. Play Mad Scientist with rabbit repellant.

26. Fry eggs on Trex decking.

27. Apply Gold Bond powder everywhere on one's person.

28. Remove prosthesis.

29. Sweat.

30. Change clothes.

31. Woos out totally and turn on both the central air and the window air.

32. Wear blue and white seersucker shirts and army-green capris.

33. Demonstrate total dorkage.

34. Watch turtles sun themselves on riverbank.

35. Try to remember how to clean a turtle. Just in case.

36. Be glad you don't live in Phoenix.

37. Overheat and pass out.



We really have a lot of fun in July. Gets to be even more fun in August.
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7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sounds a lot like here in KC but we don't wave at people because they might think you are threating them and you could get shot.

July 1, 2008 at 11:13 AM
Eileen said...

Well at least you *have* air conditioning :-)

Actually, it sounds an awful lot like July in Atlanta or Raleigh. 'Cept for the rabbit repellent (more need to deter snakes and raccoons). 'And the cooking on the deck (bake cookies in the car instead - yes, I know it's a heath risk, but is there anything truly *real* in slice-n-bakes anyway). I'm sorry you're going to this - but have to admit I don't miss it. At all. Hang in there - and yes, I owe you an email. Stay tuned! - eileen

July 1, 2008 at 10:56 PM
dragonmom said...

This is actually pretty early for it to be this hot.

I don't want to think about cities in the SE. Have a friend who lives just outside Atlanta and she has the air on most of the year, I think. LOL

Will be glad to hear from you, dear.

July 2, 2008 at 10:22 AM
dragonmom said...

Geeze, Once! That pretty much sux.

July 2, 2008 at 10:23 AM
Eileen said...

You know what they say: You know that you live in the South when you run the heat and the air conditioner in the same day.

I don't miss it. Not at all. Give me the damp, woodsy smelling PNW any day. - eileen

PS: I stole your line and built upon it ;-)

July 2, 2008 at 8:27 PM
dragonmom said...

mmmmm I love the smell of woods.


I saw that. Surprised I didn't wake the neighbors I was laughing so hard.
LOL

July 3, 2008 at 8:11 AM
Anonymous said...

I lived in the PNW for a while and I can remember is the "Tacoma aroma". Why do paper mills smell so foul?

Sure was green though. Never had a "green" Christmas before I was out there.

July 3, 2008 at 9:47 AM

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