Icky Nicky

I just despise any movie with Adam Sandler, but I most despise "Little Nicky."

IMO, that movie should never had been made.

It's pointless.

It's dumb.

It's just downright stupid.

The premise is not funny.

The "star" is not funny.

The whole thing is not funny.

Every now and again, it comes back on cable to give me heartburn and nausea.

I hate that movie.

More rain

Looks like it will rain, yet again, in an hour or two.

The temperature is OK, mid-70s, but it's so humid that the air is palpable. Looks like fog...

A.C. will go on pretty soon, just to take some of the humidity out of the air in the house. I really hate being shut up, though. Hard choice: sticky/sweaty or open to the outdoors? *sigh*

Wonder if I went back to bed and stayed there all day anyone would notice? I could read, watch some television if there would be anything on worth watching, nap and generally make myself scarce.

VWP Redux

OK, like an idiot I allowed myself to be enticed by an invitation to the local watering hole.

Friday night and, as I expected but hoped against, the place was cheek to jowl with Very White People.

I have an excess of optimism when it comes to hoping there will be at least one person, just one, that can carry on an intelligent conversation.

I had one beer and went out and sat on the curb by the truckmobile.*

The ants on the street were more interesting than the herd in the bar.

The VWP yesterday evening were a different bunch of VWP than the last gaggle I wrote about. Not as different as apples and oranges but more different like a macintosh and a red delicious apple. Same species, slight differences. Just as fatuous, though.

* It's been hot, muggy and raining. The heat is bothering me more than usual and one beer was all I could handle. I'm tired and not feeling real great and shouldn't have gone anywhere but to bed.

Naomi Klein vs. Fox News

Great clip:

Go Go Klein!

My observation is the Ms. Klein's intensity and intelligence make the purple-clad cleavage-bouncer look vacuous.

I also noticed that Ms. Klein could hardly get a point throughly verbalized before she was run roughshod by "other expert's opinions."

She is, of course, correct in her assertion that we need to develop energy diversity. We need to change our infrastructure. Is it any wonder that Faux News personnel didn't wish to hear her out?

"1 to 5 years" for new offshore drilling to produce? Where did he get that? I want documentation.

And, golly gee whiz shave my legs and call me a girl, Sen. McSame gets brought up... uh, why? How is the "holiday gas tax" likely to ease our serious energy problem?

And Dirk Dorkage brings up tapping into reserves. He then, seemingly, does an about face when Ms. Klein managed to utter a partial statement about "short tem solutions." Hey, Dirk, you seem to be besotted with the sound of your own voice. Let the lady speak!

Then Ms. Klein moves on to climate change and energy monopolies. Didn't get very far with that, either.

Next, totally out of left field, Purple comes up with a question about whether or not Ms. Klein is anti-capitalist. Whazzat? I fail to understand the relevance of that question to the "discussion."

Finally, FINALLY, Ms. Klein gets to state that the book is about policies and government, not off-shore drilling, anti-capitalists or lacquered talking heads.

My opinion? Naomi Klein presented herself with aplomb and dignity.

The Faux News dweebs? I'm at a loss as to how I would describe their performance. Only thing that comes to mind is... well, nothing comes to mind.

Here's one to think on...

Netroots Nation

Agricultural methods exacerbate flooding

From the Des Moines Register, June 22, 2008:

"In all of our reading about the floods and rebuilding Iowa, there is no mention of the role of agriculture in these recent events. Out of this catastrophe needs to come some understanding that industrial agriculture has caused many of the issues that happen downriver from cultivated land. A deterioration of good conservation and resource-management practices over the last 50 years has helped make these "rain events" even more catastrophic.

There was some discussion about this after the floods of '93, but agriculture policy continued to ignore the environment and implemented more policies that allowed Iowa to become the sacrifice area for agribusiness corporations, putting profit before stewardship.
Advertisement

Sen. Tom Harkin worked hard to get the Conservation Security Program in place but has had to continually fight for appropriations for this project. A good many Iowans understand the importance of agriculture in this state, but few understand that while Mother Nature may send us gully washers, human beings have added to the devastation by draining wetlands, plowing up waterways and planting only corn and soybeans..."

Full story here: Flooding


This one from the Washington Post:

"As the Cedar River rose higher and higher, and as he stacked sandbags along the levee protecting downtown Cedar Falls, Kamyar Enshayan, a college professor and City Council member, kept asking himself the same question: "What is going on?"

The river would eventually rise six feet higher than any flood on record. Farther downstream, in Cedar Rapids, the river would break the record by more than 11 feet.

Enshayan, director of an environmental center at the University of Northern Iowa, suspects that this natural disaster wasn't really all that natural. He points out that the heavy rains fell on a landscape radically reengineered by humans. Plowed fields have replaced tallgrass prairies. Fields have been meticulously drained with underground pipes. Streams and creeks have been straightened. Most of the wetlands are gone. Flood plains have been filled and developed..."

That one is here: Act of Man

How can something that is so obvious to so many people be beyond the understanding of policymakers and farmers alike?

Between corporate farms, greed, ethanol and the USDA, things are a real mess.
Then there is no less a personage than Jerry DeWitt who says (in the Post article):

"I sense that the flooding is not the result of a 500-year event," said Jerry DeWitt, director of the Leopold Center for Sustainable Agriculture at Iowa State University. "We're farming closer to creeks, farming closer to rivers. Without adequate buffer strips, the water moves rapidly from the field directly to the surface water."

But officials are puzzled. Of course they're puzzled. They're officials and they aren't supposed to be smart. They are slogging around in a bog of presuppositions that will likely lead to nothing whatsoever but more of the same denial and head-in-sand outlook.

There are numerous bad things going on. Ethanol is a real BIG bad thing. This isn't just my opinion, either. Experts, not officials but real experts, have documented high levels of greenhouse gases produced by ethanol production. Then there is the issue of corn being planted on the same ground year after year after year. To do that and force the corn to grow, massive application of herbicides, pesticides and fertilizers are necessary. Corn doesn't stop run off and all that chemical crap will end up in already polluted river, lakes and streams.* Many farmers know that. They are in a financial bid because they are squeezed between making a living and the damned federal government, namely the USDA.

Since agriculture is no longer localized, farmers can't afford to diversify in the manner necessary to preserve the land. They rely on federal subsidies, futures contracts and other fraudulent money-making ideas to keep their heads above water. This has all happened in the last 25 years and it's killing our land.

Listen to the experts, officials, would you? You're a bunch of paper pushers and plutocrats who don't know anything more than who to schmooze with and the best place for a power lunch. Morons. Short-sighted and foolish is what you are.


* A sidelight on this issue: When the levee here broke in June and drained the milpond a perfect opportunity was opened to dredge the area. This can't be done without a special hazmat company doing it. Why? 20+ years of chemicals washed downriver from fields. Thanks, guys, I know you're trying to make a living but you are killing the land you count on the survive.

Did somebody say "higher eddukayshun?"

That's a scan of a letter DS2 received yesterday from his Institution of Gross Incompetence.

There are a number of things that don't make any sense at all.

1. Why didn't they make this decision before a whole raftload of supposedly graduating sophomores had to sign up for it? It's likely there will be rioting in the office at IGI because that's the only class that was left to complete a number of students' credit hours.

2. What do Health and Nutrition have to do with Comm Skills 1? Nothing. Nada. Zero. Zilch.

3. How can a student be in two classes "simultaneously?" Someone have a call in to Stephen Hawking? Maybe he knows...

The real wanker part of this? They attached a statement telling DS2 he owes them $675.00.

morons.

Earworms

I wonder if anyone has scientifically figured out why we get earworms. You know earworms... that piece of a song that gets stuck in your head, sometimes for days.

It goes around and around and around and around and won't go away.

I have had that "freecreditreport.com" song about tourists in t-shirts bouncing from side to side all week. For some reason, my brain insists on changing tourists in t-shirts to fuzzy poodle skirts. I don't know why... The monotony of that has been broken every now and again by "afternoon delight" by the starland vocal band.* Now they have both been replaced by the theme from Gilligan's Island.

Honestly, what's a girl to do?


* I despised that song when it came out and it hasn't improved with age. Ick.

A hairy situation. Or not.

I finally became totally fed-up with random hairs sprouting on my chinny-chin-chin.

I am not one of the three little pigs.

I am not of Mediterranean ancestry.

I am not a male.

I'm not putting up with the constant tweezing although even then, some simply were to fine to be grabbed even with my fancy-schmancy Tweezerman tweezers.

This morning, while digging through my basket of makeup and suchlike, I came across a tube of Extra Strength Creme Bikini Hair Remover with Orchid and Marine Extracts.*

So I slathered a bunch on my chin and waited for about 15 minutes. Then got in the shower.

Scrub-a-dub-dub, old broad in the tub....

The hair is gone.

So is all sensation around my chin.

*sigh*


* I don't know where it came from. What the heck would I need bikini depilatory for? Haven't owned a bikini in 25 years.

Cleaning house

Have hauled 2 carloads of stuff to the women's shelter and a second-hand place. Another load to go to a friend who sells used clothing and another load to the 2nd hand place.

And I'm barely getting started.

If I haven't worn it or didn't know it was there? It's gone.

If I've been keeping it for sentimental reasons? It's gone.

If I've been hoping I'll fit back into it? It's gone.

If it hasn't been used in 2 years or more? It's gone.

After the current auction on eBay is done? I'm gone from there.

Setting up a store on a site called eCrater. More flexible, it's free (for now) and traffic on the site is increasing. I have stacks and stacks of stuff to get listed, too. Am gtting DS2 into the program to take photos of stuff for me. Lots of postcards and printed materials can be scanned.

Have only 3 items of glassware because it's become impossible to guarantee safe delivery. In a shipment lot of 5 different items, at least one will get broken. Doesn't matter how well you pack, stuff arrives in pieces. Doesn't matter if it's the Post Awful or UPS, things gt broken. FedEx is a LOT better but it's hard to get things to the FedEx depot around here.

I'm also in a nasty mood. Had an argument with Himself last night and that just ruins my day. Dammit.

Oh, come ON, people!

Just passed through the living room and noted, out of the corner of my eye, a commercial for a new product by Listerine. It's green and attracts all that awful stuff you miss when you brush.

It also kills bad breath germage.

It also is aimed at Mommies with kids 6 - 12.

Since when did Mommies start worrying about kid that age having bad breath?

Unless they have a medical condition or don't brush their teeth or....

The most likely scenario is Mommy gives them all kinds of sugary drinks, garbage food and overall poor nutrition.

Ah, yes! That would explain it.

Sheesh.

R.I.P. Common Sense, I certainly miss you.

Want to know why I despise pink?

This is an illustration of my Mother's penchant for frills, cancan underskirts and so forth. Saddle shoes, honestly!



Then there is the Pink Monster. Ribbed knit, coral pink, lacy shirt, gloves, lace anklets, bag from hell and, just as a crowning achievement, a totally dorky hat. Quite a sartorial statement, I'd say.




Finally, the apex of"mygodwhatwasshethinking!!!" The Easter suit from hell. There I was, almost 12, being forced to wear one of the most god-awful creations to ever leave the sales floor at Bergo's. You'd think the PINK shell would be bad enough, wouldn't you? It wasn't necessary for me to move to cause instant blindness in onlookers. Acid green, turquoise, poisonous yallery-greenery, pink (yet again), coral and white stripes. Diagonal stripes. If someone had filmed that thing it would have crawled like a slug...
I remember that suit 41 years later. It may be the last thing I ever see in my mind's eye at the end of my life.
Some memories just don't go away...

Brain slog

This was a bizarre weekend. Just absolutely bizarre in so many ways. It's impossible to accurately describe how weird it was. Sort of like everything was off about 1° from reality. I don't know whether I want to cry or if I'm on the verge of an anxiety attack or what but I'm feeling just grotty.

Wedding photos

DDIL brought discs with the wedding pictures. All righty!

933 wedding photos from 11 sources, including ours.

mercy.

DS2 volunteered to do some correction on them. I believe he raised his hand before he knew there were 933 of them.

Once he finishes with that, copies shal duly be sent by mail or electronically to every person on the face of the earth.

So there.

Dust of Ages (work in progress)

Well, DDIL and I restarted sorting through more of the voluminous crappola that was removed from my father's house a couple of years ago. There is so much stuff that it's overwhelming.

She asked, in that stating-a-fact manner when you don't want to insult someone so you ask a question, "Didn't your Dad EVER throw ANYTHING away?"

Well, no.

Neither did any of my assorted grandparents, aunts, uncles, greats of various descriptions and probably prior generations with whom I am not familiar all the way back to the flood of Noë.

It's a veritable gallimaufry* of stuffage.

The Herd brought down about 15 boxes and then bugged out, leaving us Ladies to have at it.

A short list of, um, "interesting finds:**

1. An antique hernia truss. It's about 8 inches wide, made of thick leather and has straps with buckles on both sides. Not my idea of casual wear. Especially not in summer.
2. A tall felt-lined leather case with a 3 piece metal something-or-other in it and room for two other somethings, to boot. DDIL thinks it may be a really old wine case. That's the only suggestion made so far so I think I'll accept that as identification. I sure don't know what it is.
3. Ten years, or more, of John Thompson and Daily Dozen piano lesson books. The very early ones have cute gnome-like creatures all named after various musical notes, sharps, flats, clefs and so forth. Nowadays they would be considered too frightening for kids but not back in the days when people didn't worry too much about hurting their kidlets delicate psyches. I'd bet my eye teeth my mother never knew what a "psyche" was.
   
4. An original Twister Game, Dating Game, Video Village and Mousetrap. All complete and in their boxes. Anyone wanna play a game that is designed to humiliate players and contribute to back pain? Maybe eBay.....
   
5. A stuffed original Mountain Dew man from the late '60s. I don't know where the hell that came from. It's about 2 feet tall and un-p.c. as all get out.
6. Various and sundry el-dumbo religious tracts, books and what-all. Once again... ???????
7. The remains of my mother's wedding gown. She remade it into her Eastern Star ceremonial gown but kept the odds and ends left over. Maybe she thought it would make good parachutes for munchkins or something.
8. Several extremely ratty stuffed animals. One was some kind of oooogly Furby-looking thing that is about a foot tall, has a snout and is bright pink. I can't imagine having that anywhere in a bedroom. It'd give Dracula nightmares.
9. Stenographer notebooks full of school assignments and a few with my high school attempts at learning shorthand. I flunked Office Skills four years in a row, assisted by an inability to type, take dictation or master shorthand. I'd have been better off in shop.
10. Boxes and boxes and boxes and boxes of stamps. We haven't brought all of those down yet. I don't have a clue as to how many individual stamps my Dad had. There's a LOT of them. By a lot I mean, like in the thousands. I don't even know of any philatelists within 100 miles so I'm not sure what I will do with the things.
11. Two WWII-era Army stretchers. Like you see loaded on the jeeps on M*A*S*H*, you know? I have no idea what I will do with those, either. Maybe I should call the armory and ask if they want a couple of additions to their collection?
12. A very nice copy of the New York Herald from April 15, 1865 about Lincoln' assassination. And some interesting information concerning Jeff Davis' speech on the fall of Charlotte. (i think.)
13. A Victorian-era skirtbox with lots of 1940s, '502 and '60s toys. *sigh*
14. Christmas decorations up the wazoo. There's more of those around, too. I am planning on donating 75% of them to the women's shelter.
15. Oh, yeah. I forgot to mention Dad's fondness for cocktail napkins and match books. We have a shit-can load of those.

So. We now have one large pile for the landfill. One large pile for donation. One medium size pile for eBay.

Indefatigable DDIL is coming back next weekend to "finish everything up." I didn't wish to deter her by telling her that what we got through yesterday is only a fractional amount of what's waiting.*** We have a large attic and, well, it's pretty close to full.

I have forgotten how many dumpsters we filled when we emptied Dad's house. I know we sent truckloads of stuff to the shelter, more truckloads to people in need of furniture and suchlike, a couple of truckloads to a friend who runs and unofficial keep-it-all farm. He finds people that need stuff and gives it away to them.

It's telling that we all worked on that house for days. And days. Sis and Liz came up for three days and Sis, although stout of heart, doesn't want anything more to do with any of this stuff. I can't say I blame her.

Having someone help sort all of this makes it easier for me to decide what to do with stuff, too. I have a regrettable predilection for keeping things on the off-chance that I might need it next week. The moss-covered three-handled family grudunza that I got rid of last week is likely to be vital to the survival of the Free World week after next, you know. I keep waiting for something like that to happen but, oddly enough, it doesn't seem to.

There's also the matter of family photos. A bunch of boxes of slides. 8 and 35 mm film reels, negatives and various other bits and pieces. I'm gradually sorting through the photos but don't have any idea what the dickens to do with the other stuff. I would sort of like to have the film dubbed to dvd but it's frightfully expensive and the results would likely be embarrassing for me, my offspring and all living friends and relatives. Dad had this weakness for hauling the video equipment out at the drop of a hat.**** Thus, the films. We still have the projector and screen but, on my honor, I have no intention of setting that all up and starting a movie night with popcorn, ice cream and myself 45 years and more ago.

One real embarrassment would be the fact that I was always skinny as a rail and homely to boot. Another deterrent? My Mom really wanted a proper daughter so she always stuffed me into frilly pink dresses, curled my hair and shoved my feet into patent-leather mary janes. In white, lace-trimmed anklets, forsooth.# This never worked very well as I was likely to get in a fist fight with a cousin, fall out of a tree, find any oil-based paint cans within 50 miles, jump from the garage roof with a pillowcase for a 'chute just to see if it would work, or some other disastrous event that spelled the end of the frilly dress. (Poor Mom, all she wanted was a nice girly-girl who liked dressing up, someone who liked having long curled hair and fingernails, sort of like my friend Denise. Instead, she got me. *sigh* That answers the question as to why my mother looks so cranky in formal photos.) She had high hopes when my first child turned out to be female but was destined to be disappointed, yet again.##




*Isn't that a marvelous word? Gallimaufry:
1. a hodgepodge; jumble; confused medley.

My thanks to dictionary.com.

** This is by no means an exhaustive list.
***If she lets DS1 know what's up I hope he keeps his mouth shut.
**** I don't recall the appearance of lights, film and a movie camera precipitating a mass exodus of family members from holiday celebrations but I was a kid and wasn't paying attention.

# Maybe if everyone asks nicely I'll scan a photo of one of those outfits and put it up for the purpose of promoting general merriment and hilarity. I have quite a few of them. One particularly hideous example is an Easter outfit that I remember with horror although it's been more than 40 years since I saw it last. That one includes, the anklets fixation, white gloves, a hat, curled hair, patent mary janes and That Kewt Suit. Gawd. Mom thought it was just the cat's pajamas. I felt like a psychedelic barber pole.
## She was always proud as punch of Once, even though dear daughter was likely as not to be scraped, banged, bruised, blackened, burned or what-not. She did wear some frilly teensy baby clothes that were shower gifts and gramma, an optimist to the end, thought that was a good sign. When Once started showing a marked propensity for hoydenism, the end of frills was in sight.